Tasers Set On Stun…and Journey’s Greatest Hits

itaser.jpgUh oh. The Taser, this year’s suburban lady Tupperware, has now made inroads to a younger demographic, or at least to anyone that knows how to download songs off the computer machine. At the Consumer Electronics Show in Vegas a horrifying hybrid called the iTaser was unveiled. It is indeed an mp3 player/Taser combo, as you may have surmised. Goody! According to Beware of the Blog:

The spokesman for the iTaser company says their product is aimed at women who want personal protection but usually choose to take a music player instead of a weapon with them when they go out. Now they can have both! “Personal protection can be both fashionable and functionable.”

Firstly, why are these solely being marketed to women? Like I wouldn’t want to tase some fucker who’s messing with me while listening to “Bossy” by Kelis? But come on, do we really need these Taser hybrids? What’s next, Marc Jacobs rigging all his purses with Tasers? Are our smart phones now all going to come with the satisfying “personal protection” of 50,000 volts? Oh brave new world, where irrational fear and luxury goods go skipping hand in hand into the night.

Earlier: Don’t Tase Me, Bra

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